Take Responsibility of Your Own Happiness
Take Responsibility of Your Own Happiness
How are you going to identify people that are happy around you? Mere smiling faces are not enough. Soul at peace is significant. Answer is simple. Try to enlist the characteristics required for a person to be happy and evaluate each person living in your life against those parameters. If above then 50% of the enlisted characteristics are fulfilled, then that means they are the happy and positive people.
If lower than 50% of the enlisted characteristics are available in them then they are the negative energy people and highly contagious. Try to get rid of them or maintain a big space from them in a respectable manner.
[su_quote style=”default” cite=”Mike Cart ” url=””] Here’s my happiness philosophy in a nutshell. I feel that I am directly responsible for what happens in my life.[/su_quote]Now your mind must be wondering for the question that why in our previous learnings we learnt to love humanity and try not to be judgmental about people’s actions and decisions. Just let them live. Then why here I am talking about maintaining a big space from negative people.
The answer is simple: You are in learning phase, not in the distribution phase. When you master the human behaviors, develop stable attitude and find emotional reasons behind people actions then that is the stage that negative people will neither harm your peace nor alter your positivity. Remember, every lesson is not for everyone. That is the mistake when we do not follow stages. Then complain that nothing works. And psychological counselling is nothing but bunch of lies.
Few of the characteristic among happy people are that they take the responsibility of happiness over themselves. They don’t blame or criticize somebody other than themselves and neither they live in negative people’s company. They remain positive throughout their hardships. And guess what if you meet them then you will feel happiness too. Where ever they go, fragrance of happiness prevails there. Hence, they keep sharing and spreading their happiness. Like our previous learning from The Donated Happiness – Give and Get and Appreciate Everything in Your Life. The more the distribute happiness the happier they become.
[su_divider top=”yes” text=”Go to the top” style=”default” divider_color=”#FD8B00″ link_color=”#FD8B00″ size=”4″ margin=”15″]You are Responsible for Your Own Happiness
Let’s focus our discussion on taking responsibility of our own happiness. You are what you think you are. You do what you do. Decisions are yours. Actions are yours so then why responsibility is over someone else? That is contradictory. If you lost your investment then it is you who planned or executed poorly, that’s it. Accept your failures but don’t let failures make you unhappy. Failure should not be the cause of unhappiness.
[su_quote style=”default” cite=”Just Win Singh ” url=””] It’s really ironical that when we win, we love to take the total credit, but when we lose, we prefer to blame it on bad luck and unfavorable circumstances.[/su_quote][su_divider top=”yes” text=”Go to the top” style=”default” divider_color=”#FD8B00″ link_color=”#FD8B00″ size=”4″ margin=”15″]What is Eman?
Once a noble faqir was asked what is Eman? He responded a wonderful answer. If you get something, then you don’t get happy and if you lose something then you don’t get unhappy. World comes, worlds goes, but one damn cares. His statement taught us a lesson worth noting, ‘happiness and unhappiness are not linked to getting and losing’. How powerful personality you can become by overcoming the consideration of losing something big. Will teach the law of abundance someday!
[su_divider top=”yes” text=”Go to the top” style=”default” divider_color=”#FD8B00″ link_color=”#FD8B00″ size=”4″ margin=”15″]Maturity Comes with Responsibility not with Age
Weak people blame others for their actions and decisions. They keep linking their decisions by the influence of others, that could be the friends, family, siblings, social pressure, etc. Influenced from others or not, you were the person who took the decision. No one pushed you to do something in a certain way. Every mature person in an acceptable society takes his or her decisions about life by themselves. Mature people also don’t blame others for their personal actions. They accept their mistakes, say sorry, and move forward. Lingering with past is never their style of living.
[su_divider top=”yes” text=”Go to the top” style=”default” divider_color=”#FD8B00″ link_color=”#FD8B00″ size=”4″ margin=”15″]Life is a Game of Choices
You must have played physical or virtual games in your childhood. What is the common factor available in every game? Every game has choices and chances. And you might also be playing the game of life. Similarly, here we have choices and chances. Once we decide and take action then we must face the consequences.
The key is not in the action but in the decision. If you decide wisely then more the half success has already been achieved. Decision make the difference. And a significant one. And listen, you always have limited chances to get wrong decisions. A one error is a mistake, but a bunch of errors and frequent mistakes is a blunder.
[su_divider top=”yes” text=”Go to the top” style=”default” divider_color=”#FD8B00″ link_color=”#FD8B00″ size=”4″ margin=”15″]The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
Robert Frost
[su_divider top=”yes” text=”Go to the top” style=”default” divider_color=”#FD8B00″ link_color=”#FD8B00″ size=”4″ margin=”15″]The Stupid Law of Cause and Effect
Change the cause and the effect will change. That is simple to understand but difficult to apply in its true manners. Everybody does do mistakes and does take wrong decisions. But not every wrong decision taker is unhappy. Why is that so? If two people take the same wrong decision, then it is probable that one take it too personally and other just move forward. Hence, causes are same but the effect is different. Both persons took wrong decisions. But the effects were different.
What is the key in this lesson? Ponder over it and relate it to the above story of the faqir and the article Live Now – Forget Past and Forget Future. And you will get your answer. Depression is nothing but an obsessed state of unhappiness.
[su_quote style=”default” cite=”Emerson ” url=””] Shallow men believe in luck, believe in circumstances. Strong men believe in cause and effect.[/su_quote][su_divider top=”yes” text=”Go to the top” style=”default” divider_color=”#FD8B00″ link_color=”#FD8B00″ size=”4″ margin=”15″]Be Happy – Law of Compensation is for You
Many times in life many things are totally not in your control. Sometimes other’s actions cause a harm to your peace. I cannot blame you for that. Neither you need to take responsibility for the other people action to your failure. And justice is not served for everyone. Injustice and suppression is common everywhere. Let’s accept it. Done. Then how are we going to get happy in such circumstances, the circumstance that are beyond our control.
The answer is simple: You will be compensated for your loss no matter how significant the loss it. Nature (Allah) keep record of every misery in His books. Allah don’t allow anyone to do injustice with anyone. Nor He allow anyone to cause harm to anybody’s life, respect and wealth.
[su_quote style=”default” cite=”Helen Keller ” url=””] Self-pity is our worst enemy and if we yield to it, we can never do anything wise in this world.[/su_quote]Rules are simple in every religion. Take life, of the life taker. Be happy, whatever someone has done to you will be in return done to him. But that’s equality principle. Where is the compensation for the loss?
[su_divider top=”yes” text=”Go to the top” style=”default” divider_color=”#FD8B00″ link_color=”#FD8B00″ size=”4″ margin=”15″]Direct and Indirect Compensations
Happiness is when we understand the complete life rather than watching few events or part of our life. Whatever bad is or was happened to you will be compensated for in complete form or in a better form in this world. If you lost money, then you will be given more than that. The beauty is Allah don’t take loans for longer. When He takes something then he returns back much greater than the lost property or soul. Sometimes we don’t understand why we are blessed so much. Reason is simple, you are getting the compensation for past or the future mishap.
[su_divider top=”yes” text=”Go to the top” style=”default” divider_color=”#FD8B00″ link_color=”#FD8B00″ size=”4″ margin=”15″]The System of Saving Account of Happiness
So next time before complaining from nature, remind yourself to be patient and be happy for the returns are much bigger then loss. Like you will be aware about the Saving Account of the banks. What they do? They take your money for 1 year and you have to bear the pain of keeping them away from utilization. Then after 1 year of investment period they return your money with added value. Such banking system is not allowed in Islam as it is not allowed to earn money on selling money. However, that’s another thing but the idea of saving account is significant in understanding misery of the life in true fashion.
[su_quote style=”default” cite=”Anonymous ” url=””] Having the right to do it doesn’t mean it is right to do it.[/su_quote][su_divider top=”yes” text=”Go to the top” style=”default” divider_color=”#FD8B00″ link_color=”#FD8B00″ size=”4″ margin=”15″]We Become What We Do
If the past has taught us anything
It is that every cause brings its effect.
Every action has a consequence.
We Chinese have a saying:
‘If a man plants melons he will reap melons’
If he sows beans, he will reap beans’.
And this is true of everyone’s life;
Good begets good, and evil leads to evil.
True enough, the sun shines on the saint
And the sinner alike, and too often
It seems that the wicked prosper.
But we can say with certainty that,
With the individual as with the nation,
The flourishing of the wicked is an illusion, for,
Unceasingly, life keeps books on us all.
In the end, we are all the sum total of our actions.
Character cannot be counterfeited,
Nor can it be put on or cast off as if it were
A garment to meet the whim of the moment
Like the marking on wood which are ingrained
In the very heart of the tree,
Character requires time and nurturing
For growth and development.
Thus, also, day by day, we write
Our own destiny, for inexorably…
We become what we do.
Madame Chiang Kai-shek
[su_divider top=”yes” text=”Go to the top” style=”default” divider_color=”#FD8B00″ link_color=”#FD8B00″ size=”4″ margin=”15″]About the Author
This article is written by Shad Muhammad.
(c) Some Rights Reserved.
[su_divider top=”yes” text=”Go to the top” style=”default” divider_color=”#FD8B00″ link_color=”#FD8B00″ size=”4″ margin=”15″]Tags:
Share this: